the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize