You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Randomize
