i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
