Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
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