I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
