It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
