are you still at the devil's house?
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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