There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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