im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize
