I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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