My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
