im gay
i know
yea but for you.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Randomize