i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
