I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
It was like getting head from an anaconda
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
