people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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