Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
