Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
