love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Randomize
