dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
