Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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