Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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