Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
