I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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