We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
