making cat noises will not fix the situation.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize