what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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