What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Randomize
