Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
