My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize