I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
