He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
