People with herpes should wear stickers.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Randomize
