what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
