i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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