I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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