Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize