Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
