yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize