those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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