Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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