We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
