Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
