I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
