Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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