I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I'm always down for nudity.
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