i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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