Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize