Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
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