watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Randomize
