Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
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