so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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